February 2012
57 posts
Line of the Day
“When it comes to oral gymnastics, Mitt Romney is far more gifted than Linda Lovelace ever was. If politics doesn’t work out for him, he should seriously consider hardcore porn.”-Jim Wright
typekast answered your question: Choose Your Weapon
My smile. It kills.
It is quite devastating.
littlespot answered your question: Choose Your Weapon
A Bastard or Hand and a Half Sword. 1)Can be used with 1 or 2 hands. 2)Don’t need to worry about ammo or fuel. 3)Easily Sharpened.
Sensible choice, and very solid reasoning.
If I’m ever facing Armageddon, I want you folks by my side!
Choose Your Weapon
Armageddon is near, and you have a coupon for one free weapon of your choice at the local weapon shop. What weapon do you choose and why?
Not sure what to say, but Megadeth’s Dave Mustaine’s endorsement of “pro-life” Santorum are the kind of words that might make the English language moot.
V-D Taulk
gilmoure:
I made breakfast and dinner for the wife today.
‘Course, I make breakfast and dinner just about every day.
Likewise. Except the “wife” part.
And another bitch about moving this time is that we’ll be moving again, soon. We’re only here (which really isn’t convenient for where school/work are) filling out a friends lease while finding a better place. So we’re gonna live out of boxes for the next six to eight weeks or so.
Moving Sucks
This old hippie is sore.
Also, how did we end up with so much stuff? We’re minimalists, dammit!
Son, Don't Make Me Squish You
One truth when you get to my age is that you no longer have to brawl to prove your manhood. So when a loudmouth young buck gets in your face, you really don’t want to escalate the confrontation. As one of my buddies says “at our age, you win the fight, but it still hurts.” I wanted to explain to him that age and treachery beats youth and speed most every time, and that I’ve...
Almost five years ago, San Francisco became the first American city to ban plastic shopping bags from supermarkets and chain pharmacies. Now the city is poised to expand that ban to all retail stores and restaurants within the city limits. Only certain products, like newspapers, fish, poultry, fresh flowers, and bulk goods are exempted from the ban. The San Francisco Board of Supervisors...
Memo to a soon to be ex-housemate:
Heating food is not “cooking”.
bluegypsy said: I do that too, forgetting that others may not think my past as funny as I do.
Yeah, sometimes people who weren’t there when it happened can’t quite understand. I’ve got more than a few life stories that would be “disturbing” in casual...
I Should Be More Careful What I Say
So the woman and I are cuddling, and talking about the stress of moving.
Her: “It makes me want valium.”
Me: “It makes me want heroin.”
Well, she kinda freaked out about that. She knows I’m a former junkie, and that it’s been about 30 years since I last shot up, but in her mind heroin is the ultimate of drugs. She actually became worried that I really was...
Boxing With Amatuers
As I’ve alluded to in previous posts, the woman and I are moving (this weekend), which is never fun. We’ve actually moved together several times over the years, in previous episodes of living together, and we do work together pretty well. But we do seemed doomed to repeat the same conflicts every time.
See, I have decades of warehouse packaging experience. I know how to pack a box...
Things which shouldn’t exist, but do: RomneyCondoms.com
Nobody would play me in a movie.
Although it is true that if I had written the script, I would have had a better part.
Conversing with an Idiot
So I’m talking with this (annoying idiot) guy at work, and he’s really, really trying too hard to be friendly. He’s talking about what he wants in a “family”, and asks me what I’d want…
Me: “I had a vasectomy”
Him: “My mom had one of those. It kept breaking down”
I wasn’t sure whether to laugh or cry.
Almost
Being as how I’m still fairly new in Minnesota, I thought about going to a caucus tonight. Almost did. Never been to a caucus. Wasn’t sure what to wear. Figured the republican one would be more entertaining (hey, let’s talk about Santorum in public!), but I’m registered dem (well, DFL here), so not sure I’d be allowed in. Still, just trying to get in sounded way more...
This is a post to let you all know that I wont be posting anything tonight. Carry on as you were.
bluemeanies replied to your post: I take some comfort in the fact that the team that…
Every NFC Super Bowl representative since 2006 played the AFC East in the regular season in their Super Bowl year. The 49ers play the AFC East next season.
Nice to know! Thanks!
I take some comfort in the fact that the team that needed overtime to beat my beloved Niners was able to win in regulation time.
We coulda won this thing, too.
Unusual
I don’t think I’ve ever seen a team try so hard to not score a touchdown. And score one anyway.
Obligatory Super Bowl Post
As an American male, I am required by law to watch the Super Bowl. However, because my beloved Niners aren’t in it, I’m not caring about it much. Made some tasty taco dip for it though. The woman tried to watch, but quickly fell asleep (she’s snoring while I’m posting this, which is cute) on the couch. Football should really be called “handegg”, and I would...
A Quirk in the Relationship
There’s an odd quirk in our relationship, that repeats itself most every morning. I’m (almost) always the first one out of bed, and I always make coffee as the first thing I do in the morning. And (most) every morning, the woman “thanks” me for making coffee. Everyday.
I appreciate the “thanks”, but after this long it really isn’t needed.
Added: The...
Shit
seamusromney:
a slick politician named Mitt felt disdain for the poor just a bit he caught them you bet in a big safety net and treated them like they were shit
His money he spent
to be president
But it wont help him a bit
My evening has gone from “bad” to “really bad” to “total shit” in a very few hours. Anyone want to adopt an old hippie? I can cook…
typekast replied to your photo: At least they’re boneless.
AT LEAST?! I only take my rectums with bones.
Well, they’re also inverted.
There are so many possible innuendos here that I can’t settle on one.